Dreaming of Direction
nikki 
Dreaming of Direction
“But doors lead to trapdoors. A stairway leads to nothing.” -Beyoncé
I believe in the messages dreams bring. The messages may come from a supernatural entity who directly deposits heavenly wisdom. Or, perhaps, ancestors speak to you from beyond the veil. Or the messages may simply be the outcome of the brain’s synthesis of memories. It doesn’t matter to me how or by whom the messages arrive to me. Just that they do. And that I listen.
In the commentary following the poem, “Space-Our Frontier” in the poetry collection Love Poems & A Good Cry, Nikki Giovanni stated that she enjoys teaching the 8:00 class because she gets her students “from their dreams.” She stated, “I’m getting their dreams and it’s so wonderful because, what they’re writing about, they’re getting into it in a different way.” I have found that writing from my dreams is an insightful experience; even more insightful when I include time to actually write about my dreams. Last week, I had the following dream.
I was on a road trip with my family. We stopped at an antique store in a small Georgia town. Inside, there were colorful and beautifully woven baskets on display tables. They weren’t expensive but they cost more than I was prepared to spend that day. I spoke to the two shop owners, a woman and a man, about the baskets. They had deep southern accents and were very nice. The man told me there were more items upstairs and pointed to a large, wide, sturdy wooden staircase. I chose not to go upstairs and, instead, continued to browse downstairs.
Another customer in the store told me there was tea available in the kitchen. I went to the kitchen which looked like a standard workplace kitchen. It had a small microwave, and electric tea kettle, overturned mugs and spoons in the dish drainer. Someone came in to get tea and remarked that the prices for the tea were reasonable. I looked at the counter and saw boxes of herbal teas in a variety of flavors. I decided since I preferred loose tea to tea bags, that I wouldn’t purchase any.
As I exited the kitchen I saw a narrow staircase off to the side. It was not the staircase that was pointed out to me before. It was a back staircase and I decided to climb it. The stairs got smaller and the stairwell narrower as I ascended. At its narrowest point, it was blocked by a rattan divider attached to both sides of the wall. I could see through the slats and it appeared that the shop owners’ living quarters were beyond the divider. I could see a bedroom with a bed, a nightstand, and a lamp. And I saw the flickering light of a TV playing in the background. I thought it would be nice to have a home and workplace in the same building and felt a tinge of jealousy. I backed down the staircase and continued to browse on the lower level.
Back downstairs, I talked to the woman shop owner. She pointed outside and asked me if I noticed anything about the stairs outside. I looked outside and saw stairs that appeared to be coming from a house across the street that was under construction. At first, I thought the stairs led to a tree. I squinted and realized that the stairs did not, in fact, attach to the tree. Instead, they swung behind it like a crane. I turned to the woman to answer her question. “Yes,” I said. “They go nowhere.”
Then I woke up.
So, I know this could just a bunch of random memories. Yes, I stop at antique stores while on road trips. And I’m really a loose leaf tea snob. And, in real life, I find Indigenous baskets and southern accents beautiful. But I’ve been thinking about those staircases for the past week. As I wrote in my journal:
So, in my dreams, there were 3 staircases. One was broad, sturdy, dark wood in the open and pointed out to me. I didn’t take it. One was hidden, kept getting narrower, and was blocked because someone else was living there. One was outside, under construction but led nowhere or led to a treetop or the future. I know this all means something. But what? I know the GA town symbolizes my longing for the south. The staircases. I have three possible paths.
One path was tried and true; although I had no interest in taking it. One was for someone else and I was a little jealous. One was unfinished and uncertain.
It would be nice to wake up, interpret your dreams, and immediately understand what to do next. This is the part where I need the narrator of my life to spell it out for me, make it plain, and lead me to my life’s next scene. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that. I have to sit with this. Meditate on it. Pray for guidance. I’m hoping that Spirit, the ancestors, and/or my brain provide clearer answers tonight.